Funny Cop Story

Since I’ve been such a DRAG lately, I thought I would write about a funny story from when I was on patrol.  Considering the cannabis laws being passed here in WA this fits for the times also.  Too bad for my “bad guy” who wasn’t really “bad” that the laws weren’t passed back then..this is about 10 years ago.

So, I’m sitting with my partner, running radar on our only highway in and out of our town that’s so small even I would speed through, not knowing I just plowed through a town.  That being said we were in the meth capital of the United States at the time, so I forgive myself for “fishing”.  Plus, it was my JOB.  Now, my partner is 6’6″, 220 and I’m 4’11”, about 120 at the time.  The advantage is everyone talked to me and I could see EVERYTHING inside a car..EVERYTHING.

I pull over a vehicle with a tail light out.  No bad driving, just tail light.  I make contact with the driver.  The driver is about 19, actually a cute kid and is smiling ear to ear…hhhmmm.

I tell him that I pulled him over because his tail light is out and can I see his license and registration, proof of insurance.  He STARTS LAUGHING!  I’m like “What the heck is so funny?”  I smell pot, like WEED central.  I ask him “Do you have any pot on you?”  He replies “No.”  His next words were..wait for it..

“You didn’t ask if I had any in the car!”  I say “OOKAAY, Do you have any pot in your car?”

He replies “DANG IT!” like a 5 year old and whips this small bag of weed out of the side pocket of his door and just hands it to me.  I was standing there, mouth agape..then I busted out LAUGHING!!  I said “DUDE, you didn’t HAVE to tell me that, NOW what am I going to do with you?”  He said “I’m going to work, where I push grocery carts around all would be stoned if you had to do that too..”  I thought to myself he was most likely correct and waived my partner who was on the other side of the car to the back.

I told him everything, and my partner is bending over laughing.  I said “I do NOT want to take this kid to jail.  What do we do?”  He said “Let’s make him tear it up.  Like back in the “day.”  I was down for this.

I make contact again, and I’m trying to talk and not giggle at the same time.  I tell the kid.  “Get out of the car.”  His face turns white.  He gets out and I say “I don’t want to ruin your life, and I don’t want YOU to ruin your here, tear this crap up.”  He takes the bag, tears in his eyes and says, “Do you have ANY idea how much this COST me?”  I said “Do you have ANY IDEA how much JAIL COSTS?”  He nodded his head and said “OOOHH, dude, YEAH..OK, here I go.”

He proceeds to tear up the pot pieces and throws them on the ground.  He gets to the stem, a long hard stem and can’t tear it up.  He looks at me and starts panicking, the first pot smoker I’ve ever seen panic, and says “I can’t tear it up man, what do I do?”  I just laughed, grabbed it, threw it on the ground and squished it into the rocks with my boot.  He said.  “DUDE..why didn’t I think of that?”  I said “Because you are obviously stoned, my friend.”

I made him do the field sobriety tests which he PASSED with flying colors.  So I let him go.

I saw him at the store he worked at 2 months later.  I was shopping.  He was working in the electronics department.  He ran up to me and gave me a HUGE hug out of nowhere.  He thanked me and grabbed his manager.  The manager shook my hand and said because of the way I treated him he got his crap together.  They all liked him and could see potential, he was just always baked.

So, long story short, not everyone was a bad guy.  Loved that kid.  Hope he’s good.


9 thoughts on “Funny Cop Story”

    1. No it isn’t! Don’t you wish more people would see life that way? By the way UPDATE! The “kid” made manager and is now a father of 3…small town. I had to check. Good news!!

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