Category Archives: Movies

If Bee Movie Told The Truth

http://www.highdefdiscnews.com/screenshots/bee_movie_3.pnThe more I watch this movie, the more disturbed I am by it.  My toddler likes it.

Before you start judging me about letting my 21 month old watch TV, she already counts to 12, knows her basic colors most of the time, gets read to every single day, and had over a 200 word vocabulary by the time she was 18 months old.  It’s lack of parental involvement that leads to problems in children, not TV and violent video games.

*getting off my soapbox now*

Sure, it’s a cute enough movie, considering all the other crap that’s out there for kids, but it goes beyond lying to kids about bee behavior.

Okay, now that I think about it, the movie presents a great opportunity for parents to educate their kids about bees and what would happen to the world if we didn’t have bees.  But would most parents take this opportunity?

I’m all about not sugar-coating things for my kids.  When my son was four and didn’t want to hold my hand while crossing the street, I explained to him the gruesome, detailed truth about what would happen if he got hit by a car.  Suffice it to say he stuck by my side in parking lots after that.

Bee Movie sugar-coats and encrusts; whipped cream tops; sprinkles cinnamon, sugar, and chocolate chips; drizzles caramel and chocolate syrup; garnishes with sliced strawberries; and throws some crystallized ginger and a cherry on top.

Let me explain.

Point 1:  Bees don’t gather pollen with high-tech contraptions.

Okay, this isn’t that bad.  I guess it’s more exciting and interesting than having the cartoon bee carry around pollen on its legs.

Point 2:  Gender roles.

Heaven forbid a human child should ever learn that there are set gender roles within the animal kingdom, and a female bee can’t be anything she wants.

Female bees go out and collect.  Male bees stay home and mate with the queen.

Point 3:  That is NOT the way bees make honey.

I guess the thought process was probably to show kids how all the bees work together and “get behind a fellow… black and yellow… hello!”  Whatever.

Okay, it wouldn’t be appropriate to have the cartoon bees barfing up the sweet, delicious honey we humans spread on buttered toast.  Yummm.

Point 4:  Bees don’t live after they sting.

Their guts get ripped out.  That would have been a traumatic and gory scene when Adam stung Mr. Montgomery.

Plus, that would have made Adam a female.

If Bee Movie told the truth, it wouldn’t make a very cute movie.

MJ

Learning Life Lessons From Asian Horror…

AAAHHH!!! That’s pretty much all I need to say about the movies I watch. I LOVE scary movies. I watch them every chance I get. The only problem is that my husband actually gets scared and thinks something is wrong with me.

I specifically like the supernatural and Zombie apocalyptic movies. I absolutely love Asian horror and have been delving into Spanish horror. Now the Asian’s have GOT THIS NAILED! Not just because of The Ring or The Grudge, but the many movies that tell a story and generally teach a life lesson in the end. Like, don’t lie to your mother or some ghost with A LOT of hair is going to hunt you down and throw you off of a building, but not before it throws all of your friends and family off first. The Spanish one’s have a lot of gore and some really disturbing scene’s and I have found that I do not enjoy them as much. Like I have said before, I don’t do “real” very well. I tried to watch Schindler’s List and in less than 10 minutes I was ready to hang myself. The same goes for most chick-flicks.

During my last visit to see MJ, she introduced me to the Zombie genre. I love her more now, really. She has no idea how much that expanded my mind.

So, I guess the fact that my favorite movie of all time is The Princess Bride doesn’t fit in, but that’s just too dang bad.

My favorite horror movie of all time is The remake of The Day of The Dead. I am also actually in love with Zombieland. I love the characters and I live by the rules, like “#1, CARDIO!” hey, you never know when you are going to have to run. I found that out in a few foot pursuits. Yes, I caught them, caught them ALL..BWAH-HA-HA-HA..aaahh, livin’ the dream, sorry, I got a little excited there.

Now, since I am aware that my husband thinks I am sick in the head, every time he comes home I hurry up and turn whatever movie I have found for the day off. He said “How come when I walk through the door all I hear is someone screaming bloody murder?” I said, “Because they are, get over it.” and then I pretend I’m reading the news. You know, trying to look all smart and stuff.

I have been watching Paranormal Witness and I have to say that show scares the daylights out of me. I don’t scare easy, and some of these people are probably loony tunes, or trying to make money, but some of the stories are really just unexplainable. I guess that is kind of “real” but still, it’s reality TV, so no it’s not real…right? Some other movies that actually scared me recently are Apartment 143, The Innkeepers, and The Road. I didn’t even finish The Road. I’ll try today.

I have watched so many scary movies I can’t think of all of them. That’s a good thing. I can’t have that stuff stick around for too long. Just long enough to get the taste of fear, then go to bed. I made my husband watch The Descent, like a year ago. He still can’t even look at the cover of the DVD! That was fun. He was so scared, he kept shivering and saying “Oh my god, I can’t watch this, wait..what happens next?” Don’t tell anyone I said that.

My daughter used to love to watch the movies with me, but she isn’t interested in them anymore. I think she even thinks I am weird. Oh well, she doesn’t have to partake, but I will continue to try and scare myself silly as often as possible. That just sounded so wrong, on so many levels.

No Chick Flicks, Please.

My favorite movie is The Thing – the Kurt Russell version.  My other favorite movie is the remake of Dawn of the Dead (2004).  I don’t watch chick flicks.  Okay, I normally don’t watch chick flicks.  Yes, I’ve seen 27 Dresses and Leap Year and was surprised that I liked both of them, but I won’t voluntarily watch a chick flick.

I like horror and sci-fi movies.  I love being scared.  When I was little, I used to stay up late watching those old Vincent Price movies.  I’d sit through the whole movie with a blanket pulled up to my eyes, enjoying every bit of my terror.

I’m still occasionally scared of the dark.  Okay, the dark scares the crap out of me all the time.  I hate when my husband has to go out of town for work, and I have only my toddler to comfort me at night.  My teens are on the other side of the house, and I know they wouldn’t hear me scream.  They have their air cleaner running loudly, and my son sleeps like a log anyway.

I don’t get to watch movies all that often anymore, so I may just review my own collection for a time.  However, I would love to hear from readers.  In your opinion, what is the best zombie or horror flick that you’ve watched so far?  I’m talking about flicks that made you nervous to sleep in complete darkness for several nights after watching it.

MJ